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A few rough drafts

Dominate every space
Rough draft one: An app created these effects.

Happy Sunday to everyone reading this. (You might want to grab some popcorn.)

A few weeks ago, I started what should have been a wonderful collaboration with a marketing specialist. I asked a lot of questions to minimise errors. But when the invoice arrived, it seemed someone had used their elbow on the “zero” on a keyboard.

They were asking for the equivalent of 1/3 of my annual salary to do niche research, marketing, and advertising. No samples had been produced, no dry runs executed, nor analytics presented. Which means that in exchange for absolutely nothing, I would be working to keep them in Burberry and Dolce. 

One more test cover and two T-shirt designs

To end the negotiations, I sacrificed my catalog of designs. I told them to sell it all themselves. If they are good as they claim, they should be raking in the cash right now.

If you were me for the past month, you would have discovered some startling truths about advertising firms. Traffic, views and clicks can be purchased, and “stats” can be spun out of whole cloth. I now make sure that I negotiate for “my best outcomes” and ignore their “best efforts”.

Image for web store and Facebook fan page cover graphic
One’s office for social media/fan page cover

If effort alone were enough, each person reading this would be worth billions. Based on effort alone, it might be easy for all of us to set up shop as advertisers. Simply collect fee$ and promise to show your clients’ work to everyone. Then, pack yourself a nice sandwich, a smoothie, a bottle of water, and a muffin. Drive yourself down to the bay and have a picnic. Then, when clients complain that they have no traffic or sales, gaslight them and say they need to spend more money.

I guarantee that with this work ethic, you too will become a successful advertising executive in no time at all. 

Here’s hoping that you have a productive week ahead.

By ΠιCΘLΣ

Life is short, so let’s be decent.

31 replies on “A few rough drafts”

My husband started in advertising 30 years ago, when campaign ideas still required collaborative brainstorming, artistic flair, and thumbnail sketches. He’s become entirely disenchanted with the profession for many of the reasons you state… The field has changed significantly in the last 10-12 years, with the “dawn of social media” and “clicks” and “paying for eyeballs” and large corporations who want everything for free.

Liked by 1 person

I am not cool enough to read your magazine or wear your t-shirts but I admire your talent.

But what did you mean when you said you sacrificed your designs?

I wonder what it’s like to have a bs job like marketing and do nothing all day

Liked by 2 people

It’s not even a real magazine! What I meant by “sacrifice” was that I gave my catalog and product manuals to the marketing team. By my calculations, I would end up paying them out of pocket, which works for them. I have an endless capacity to create, so I am going to be fine.

Liked by 1 person

1. I did a sketch of Lenin like the one above, once.
2. Market those tees!
3. No idea why that logo is a little disconcerting. Is it supposed to do that to one?
4. How do all these “online marketing execs” BS so much? A friend of mine self-published a book once and got an “online marketing firm” to build a *campaign* for her. They charged about a third of her monthly income for this and..well you know how that turned out.
We can do better with a few good friends helping us online!

Liked by 3 people

3. Exactly! I’m not planning to use that logo because I hate it. (I switched it out for you. Thanks for the heads up).
2. I’m so glad you like my tees.
1. Release the Lenin sketch.
4. So sorry to hear about your friend. I trust no promise or guarantee. On Friday, I found three marketers, and I informed them that they would be testing each other’s strategy.

The reason these firms get away with it is because most people don’t study programming. They should be honest, though, and waste less money on staff parties so we don’t have to check up on them like this.

Liked by 1 person

If we cd rid the world of all such unnecessary jobs, what would the corporate sector look like?
And seriously, why did that logo arouse such a reaction from us? What was it about 2 lines (1 squiggly) and a dot?
I’ll send a pic of that sketch. 🙂

Liked by 1 person

I’ve no idea why we hated it but I think our instincts are on point. Looking forward to the sketch. I think that large firms are going to waste money but small business owners who don’t have banking friends should be left out of it.

Liked by 1 person

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