Narcissists may be our last line of defence in the event of an invasion. They have been studied by psychologists and social scientists. They have perplexed boyfriends, girlfriends, wives, husbands, children, friends, coworkers and voters for millennia. But don’t rehabilitate them just yet. In case Earth is invaded, we may need their unique soul sucking gifts to reduce Earth intruders (thanks Björk) to pillars of salt, muddied with twigs and branches.

Narcissists will never lose. Their only goal is to destroy you. They will do whatever it takes to achieve that. What guarantees your destruction by a narcissist is being in their field of vision. If they perceive your existence, you have become a problem, and it’s game over for you. The only way to avoid being destroyed is to avoid them completely.

That’s why we will need them to neutralise the most unkillable extraterrestrials in the known universe: The Borg and Q Continuum.

The Borg are collectively aware and do not speak as separate individuals. The Borg were once “flawed and weak”, but developed into a cybernetic species in an effort to evolve and perfect themselves. These two points make the Borg vulnerable to counterattack: They are not perfect yet and they speak as one voice because they live in “harmony.”

Narcissists are gifted at finding flaws, insecurities and emotional triggers and adapting to them so they can manipulate targets. They are also skilled at pretending to fit in with societies and cultures. They will ingratiate themselves and go through the motions of blending in, committing with utmost devotion to the sole objective of being more Borg than the Borg themselves.

Their blind devotion to all things Borg will get them promoted to Super Master Borg Ambassador in short shrift. Once they’ve earned that trust, they will switch up and launch a takeover of the collective, effectively destroying its integrity.

Remember how the Borg quickly adjust their shields to phaser frequencies? Well, that will offer no protection because narcissists excel at waffling. They’re inconsistent. They constantly change their “principles” and “theories” but only after you’ve made yourself amenable to the set they’ve just made up. They are particularly awesome at saying one thing and vehemently denying it zero point zero five milliseconds later.

This endless fluctuation will drive the Borg mad and melt their circuitry.

Game, Earth.

The Q are immortal, extra dimensional beings but are not absolutely omniscient or omnipotent. They possess the power of instantaneous matter-energy transformation and teleportation, as well as the ability to time travel. They can move entire star systems with their minds.

Aha! No one can beat them, you say? But trust me, narcissists are gifted at finding flaws. Immortality and time travel have three side effects that work against members of the Q Continuum. These side effects are boredom, curiosity and a seemingly infinite capacity to calculate outcomes based on mathematical principles. In other words, Q are happy go lucky and are always right.

Narcissists, on the other hand, have a palpable lack of curiosity. In their minds, they are always right and their truth is the only one that matters. They don’t care about things like evidence, investigation, scientific studies or obvious in front of their very eyes stuff. Narcissists love to say, “I don’t care about that” really fast. Don’t bother explaining to them the need to make the link between what they said now and what they said milliseconds ago. They don’t follow threads of thought or consider the merits of your argument. They are only concerned with making you wrong.

All narcissists can do this to some extent, but the Q can be annihilated by a special elite class of narcissist. This narcissist is known as the Mega N.

… to be continued


Life is short, so let’s be decent.

93 replies on “Invasion”

Thank you for that comment. I was very upset when I wrote this. I am still amazed I was able to write a coherent essay in one burst. The best way to handle a narcissist is to avoid them completely.


Sadly, it always seems that the victim is under scrutiny. I have a few ideas as to why. To the outsider, it appears that the victim has a choice – to leave, to withhold consent, to seek professional help, to seek protection, to pursue justice. However, one side effect of PTSD after an abusive relationship is reacting to decent human beings as if they were posing a threat. This makes it difficult for victims to recognise, appreciate or even receive meaningful support.

I have seen too many friends wail about their abusive partners, only to turn around and treat positive and balanced self concepts as judgement of their choice to stay. A friend of mine, whose significant other broke up with her every two days, and kept her awake almost every night, cheated on her and flaunted it, told me to “get out of town”. I now realise that it was the trauma of the abuse talking. It must be very difficult to face someone, like myself, who is outspoken about not tolerating abuse. However, at the time, I was offended and now my friend is isolated in that crazy-making cycle.

Also, abuse victims tend to obsess about the abusive behaviours. People who are not trained to listen may misinterpret this as the victim’s choosing to re-experience the trauma. It is a matter of perception, which is why education is needed to raise awareness about PTSD and complex PTSD. Again, because of damaged self-esteem, victims of abuse learn to see well-meaning individuals as untrustworthy. They learn to mask the abuse, protect the abuser, and justify abusive behaviour (“My abuser burnt my clothes but s/he had a terrible father”). Most well-meaning individuals give up when the abused person returns to an abusive relationship that has ended, knowing they will be abused again.

The choice to leave or stay away doesn’t seem difficult to the outside observer, but the self-defeating symptoms of PTSD/complex PTSD (explained in the video above) may explain why there is so little support for victims. Again, victims refuse to be helped, deny they are being abused, say they want to be abused, idealise aspects of the relationship, and treat well meaning individuals with suspicion.

An abuser chooses to abuse and no amount of forgiveness, understanding, or empathy that will persuade an abuser to stop treating the victim as an object. Abuse is the misinterpretation of your continued patience, understanding, attention or presence as consent to be mistreated. Your rights and boundaries will be violated. The abuser sees the victim as a means to an end.

The only way to heal is to physically and psychologically remove yourself from the situation. Then, seek out and stay in therapy while maintaining physical and emotional distance, so that you can build up your self esteem. It takes a long time and you may relapse.

The keys are to persevere, learn behaviours and attitudes that contribute to a positive self concept, build up support systems and allow those systems or individuals to support you.


Damn, I used to think I was a narcissist because of a quiz I took online that rated me as 41% narcissist but now, I’ve totally had a change of mind. I’m pretty sure I’m not one….exactly

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Ha ha ha ha … You slay me! Perhaps you took the quiz when you were in a positive frame of mind and it simply amplified the results. Dyed-in-the-wool narcissists create chaos and discord wherever they go, no matter what they say. xo


I love the whole science fiction setting of this wrapped around your theme of narcissism. I can’t wait to meet “The Mother N!” Always enjoy the eclectic mix of comments you seem to garner as well! You are a stunningly unique soul, SB, and I’m glad I know you 🙂

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Thank you so much, Nurse Kelly. I sometimes feel l have to wrap my emotions up in humour or else, what will happen? The comments are the best part of blogging and they’ve been part of the healing process. Isn’t it nice when friends distract you? Have a beautiful morning. Love x


Absolutely! I never like to hear about any pain in your life requiring healing, but then again we all have our share of it. And yes, it’s nice to have support and entertainment right at our fingertips with our blogging friends for sure. 🙂

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Sadly I understand this post too well and wish I didn’t. You illuminate my deepest anxieties with your faultless characterisation, and especially your correct observation that, as others have quoted, ” If they perceive your existence, you have become a problem, and it’s game over for you.” Heeelp

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Thank you so much for empathising. There was a lot of history that went into this outpouring of anguish. This time, I had to go to bat for someone who this kind of behaviour is affecting. I hope you’ll enjoy a drama free day. x


My sweet SB, reading you is one of the best moments of my days, so thanks to YOU… And yes, I’m in a better shape and sometimes my old words make me smile, but also measure how far I am from the start of this journey. Much love, HC

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Decadent? Let me think… 17th century fancy dresses, masks, low lights or candles, loud hypnotic music, any kind of finger food and the right amount of french wine per guest (all gluten-free, of course). You’d be my guest of honor, feel free to add suggestions. And I’m smiling again 😉 My day is going great, I wish you the same. x

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She didn’t use her long acrylic fingernails, either. Although, I think Russell Brand is kind of delicious looking. He might be an awful person in real life, but who knows?

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Will Shatner would have crushed the Borg! Their nano tubules would have gotten stuck in his matted chest hair and the Borg Queen would have lost it once he gave her his “killer smile with piercing eyes” look.

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I concur wholeheartedly. I was thinking of JLP, and his exceedingly matted chest hairs, which never protected him…. Hmmm… Perhaps they were too spaced out?


I couldn’t help but grin while reading this. Having been very much acquainted with several narcissists (some family, some friends) a lot of behavior you described was very (verrrrrry) familiar to me. Who’s the narcissist that has you fired up?

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I can’t say exactly who but it’s a situation that has got me really sad in recent days and I’m very concerned about the person the issue directly affects. I thank you so much for understanding exactly what I’m talking about. I’m sorry you understand, TA. I really am.

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Don’t feel sorry for me, I’m entirely too use to it to be affected much. In general, It helps if (the person in question) comes to understand that the narcissistic person probably isn’t going to change and that narcissistic behavior isn’t their fault. I feel sorry for your friend, untreated personality disorders can be very toxic to other people

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